UNDERSTAND THE HEARTBREAK

Wednesday, April 26, 2017

What it feels like to be broken hearted? It's hurt, isn't it? Is it like your world is turning blue, in a low light and fading? Like everything seems go too far away and you can't reach it anymore? Or it's like the world - no, the entire universe against you? Or it feels like your burned inside?

What do you want to do? Hurting back or just crying over it? There's no powerful way to get over broken heart but to deal with it. I know, it sounds so friggin' lame and super cheesy. I know you know it already. I know this is might be pointless.

But hey, let's analyze your shattered heart.

First, who did this to you?

Your family? Your friends? Your boyfriend? Everyone can breaks your heart. 
Family can breaks your heart - maybe your parents are getting divorce, or your sibling is no longer care about you. Or there's a serious problem and you really don't know how to handle or to help your parents. 

Friends can break your hear too - they no longer fun to hanging out with, they tell everyone that they're not supposed to (ex. your top secret), or simply they're no longer your friends. Or, worst, they once told you they loved you but then left anyway. 

Boyfriend... ah, love story. There's a thin line between love and hurt. To love someone is to give a trust either they can love you equally or brutally hurt you. 

Second, what did they do? 

Is your friend ignored you? Is your boyfriend cheated on you? My Mom once told me that people are what they do, not what they said they're going to. So, be rational. Is it something that can be forgiven? Is it understandable? Although from my personal perspective, not everything has to be understandable. Sometimes, it is what it is. 


Third, why they did what they did? 

You have to completely understand the reason behind it. If the reason is rational or somehow understandable, maybe this is the way to be more mature. But, if it is idiot as f, honey, this is not your story, please be brave to leave. 

Fourth, how long they did this to you? 

How many times your boyfriend lied to you? How did he? How many times your friends turned you down? Simply, the period times they did. You probably know this but let me remind you. If it's only once, maybe it was a mistake. Twice, well they didn't learn from their mistake and just really stupid. People who learn from their mistake, from their experience will not falling into the same hole. It's okay if it's different hole, maybe they didn't know.

Fifth, ask yourself: is this the story you want to live? 

If your answer is yes, then you should probably help them to be better person, help them to be able to learn from their mistake. You are the only person who can help them to understand what it feels like to be hurt. You have to tell them how you feel so they know and hopefully won't hurt you anymore.

If this is not the story you pictured on your future goals, why waste your time, honey? Be brave for yourself to walk away. We have two lives, the second one when we're realize we only have one. It takes courage to forgive but it takes the whole world to forget because the pain will stain with you. 

What I understand, this is a phase and you can get through this. It is going to be real hard, like a pain in the ass. You're gonna cry. like a lot. But you are going to be fine because you are amazing, strong and independent. You're gonna get through this, believe it. You're gonna be brave and kind and strong for yourself. Yourself only.

This pain you feel will go away. It will be fading then it's gone. It's painful, like mentally and physically hurt but you will be fine and it will go away.

As I type, I suggest myself the same. We are all humans, after all. Nobody is perfect. It is okay to cry. It is okay to feel like shit. It is okay to be weak. Remember, your feelings are valid so no shame on it. No more pretending, no more holding up your feelings.

Let's be brave together, fighter. We can get through this. It's going to be okay.


Love,

Yours truly. 

THROWBACK MOVIE | EP. 5 : STOKER (2013)

Saturday, April 22, 2017


If you're not familiar with this movie, well I guess you're not alone. Stoker, directed by Park Chan Wook is somehow an underrated movie which is kinda sad because this is actually a really good movie! For years as being movie lover, I haven't heard many people talk about this movie. I came to conclusion, it's not a movie for everyone. 

This is a story about a fairly odd family. Centered in India Stoker (Mia Wasikowska) who just lost her father, Richard Stoker (Dermot Mulroney) on her eighteenth birthday in a weird car accident. On the day of his funeral, India met Charlie Stoker (Matthew Goode), her uncle who she never knew existed. The actual story began once Charlie lived with India and her mother, Evelyn (Nicole Kidman) which strange things occurred. 

BEAUTY | EVERYDAY MAKEUP LOOK

Friday, April 14, 2017



Ever since I started graduate school, I like to use a little bit makeup for school. It's usually very simple and natural looking makeup not something that need an effort to do (but honestly, it takes an effort to get up every morning and do my makeup in hurry) but still presentable and define my face. 

In the morning, after shower I usually do my skin care routine first then leave it for few minutes whilst I get dressed. I want my moisturizer to sink into my skin first before I start my makeup. It usually takes 5 minutes for me to apply all of them, super easy and effective. I thought maybe you guys find this post useful or get some inspirations. 

TV SERIES | 13 REASONS WHY (2017)

Monday, April 10, 2017

Back in 2014, I wrote a 13 Reasons Why book review and was hoping it made it to the big screen. This is one of my favourite books, no doubt. I even thought about who played who. That's how much I wanted to see this book came into screen.

Dreams do come true, right?

2017... instead of come into big screen, the story of Hannah Baker comes into Netflix with 13 episodes which even better than movie! 


PLAYLIST

Friday, April 07, 2017


Hello April! New month, new slate, new chances!


  1. Dandelion Wishes - John Adams
  2. Don't Worry About Me - Frances 
  3. I Gave It All - Aquilo
  4. Learn to Love - W. Darling
  5. Roses - Ghostly Kisses
  6. Say It Again - Frances 
  7. Someplace Beautiful - Alfred Hall 
  8. So Good - Louisa Johnson
  9. Stay - Zedd & Alessia Cara 
  10. Tears Clean Bandit feat. Louisa Johnson 
  11. The Night We Met - Lord Huron 
  12. The Wonder of You - Elvis Presley 
 
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